by Steve Farnham, Associate Editor, All Habs Hockey Magazine
GREENFIELD PARK, QC — The offseason is taking it’s toll on me. I mean, I have taking a liking to the Montreal Impact and watching them win 5-0 in the MLS Soccer League on Saturday night to temporarily take first place in their conference was a lot of fun.
When there’s no Soccer on however, I’m usually watching episodes of The Deadliest Warrior that I’ve already seen, and it’s always awkwardly followed by that crummy 1000 Ways to Die show. If that show can only find one of them.
Also, what’s with The Bourne Identity? I like the movie but does it really have to play every single day on A&E?
I really don’t understand the whole Duck Dynasty thing by the way. “Happy happy happy”? For <censored>’s sake…
Don’t even get me started on The Big Bang Theory, I just can’t.
I miss hockey.
Do you miss it at as much as me and have a question or a topic you would like us to discuss? Okay, here’s what you can do.
Let us know:
- who you are
- where you’re from
- if you wish, send us a photo of you in your favourite Habs gear
- who’s your favorite player, present or past
- and of course, your question
You can contact us via Twitter, our Facebook page or email at info (at) allhabs (dot) net
We’ll feature you, and your question, in the All Habs Mailbag!
This week I asked:
Take 2: Hey! I'm doing the #allhabs mailbag this week. Tweet/email me your questions and later on, we can make fun of my answers!
— Steve ❌ (@stevoF_) August 19, 2013
Here we go:
Will players naming their kids after their jersey numbers become a trend now?
Eternal Pessimist (@EP31), Montreal
It appears giving your child a terrible name has become a trend nowadays. Kanye West and Kim Kardashian blew our minds away when they named their baby, North (West). Actress Shannyn Sossamon named her child Audio Science, which sounds like something I’d find in the Apple App Store. U2’s “The Edge” went with Blue Angel for his kid, and now we’re all thinking of the blue planes. Actor Rob Morrow destroyed his daughter’s life when he named her, Tu; Tu Morrow. Goddamn.
As for hockey, it’s not the first time that this happens. I think we all remember back when Wayne Gretzky and his wife Janet Jones gave birth to a daughter they named Agent 99. She went on to play in the popular television series, Get Smart.
Would Gionta be more productive without the inexplicable goatee?
Will (@HeyMyNameIsWill), Montreal
He has been pencilling that in for quite a while now hasn’t he?
The short is answer is, probably not. I mean, just look at Marvel superhero, Doc Samson whose hair became long and green following radiation exposure. His powers were superhuman. He would later realize that when his hair was cut, his powers were in turn diminished.
I’m pretty certain that this is exactly the case with Brian Gionta and his inexplicable goatee. I just don’t see any other answer.
Why do beers cost $13 at a NHL game?
Peter (@peterg117412), Long Island
For the same reasons it’ll cost you five dollars for a bottle of water at a club, or over a hundred dollars for a bottle of wine at a restaurant, you simply have no other options.
What else are you going to do? Stay sober while the Florida Panthers struggle to figure out how to get the puck out of their own zone? Don’t even get me started about a game involving the New Jersey Devils.
God forbid the Habs are playing the Leafs and losing, then I need a few beers to ease the pain, it’s no longer even considered a want.
Luckily, they offer you the trio, which is the ability to pay for your night using cash, debit and credit.
What do you think about the Douglas Murray acquisition?
Travis, Edmonton
Holy mother of mug shots; I would never let him babysit my kids. (are you warming to the idea, Steve? — editor)
I don’t necessarily believe that Douglas Murray is a very good hockey player, at least not at this point in his career. He’s a big heavy defenseman who can maybe help the Canadiens win more battles on the boards, but then again he is a defenseman and therefore won’t be playing in David Desharnais’ place either.
Knowing that offensive production is not anything he can offer, we can only hope he ends up being a steady stay-at-home defenseman, and that errors are kept to a minimum.
It’s clear with other signings like that of George Parros, that Marc Bergevin wants to make the Montreal Canadiens bigger and tougher, and next season will show us just what effects this will have on the team.
Man, that picture.
You should have submitted the mailbag already, you’re late.
Managing Editor
What a minute here, this is NOT a question.
/right click
/mark as spam
/delete
Are we going to have the good or the bad Carey Price this season?
Cory, Moncton
I’m pretty sure there’s only one Carey Price and I think that’s the guy the Canadiens will have between the pipes this season. If you want to know whether Price will have a good or a bad season, well for that I have no answer because I simply don’t know; I can’t predict the future (yet).
It will be interesting to see (or not) whether there will be any noticeable differences in Carey Price’s play with the arrival of a new goaltending coach on the team.
The only thing that is certain for the upcoming season is that every one of Carey Price’s moves will be overanalyzed, his critics will set expectations too high, and his supporters will defend him at all costs. In Montreal, that’s business as usual.
Thanks for the questions!